Welcome to my birthday week fellow blog readers. I know I need to change some shit in my life and for this whole week I will give you 3 things per day I am going to change. This is similar to a New Years Resolution, but I will call it my birthday resolutions. Simple and to the point, if you dont like it then please dont read it. I dont want to attract the HATERS to this blog.
1) I am going to watch more Jersey Shore reruns so I know every word to every episode similar to Saved By the Bell back in the day. I want to know the point in every episode where the Situation lifts up his shirt in the club so the girls can see "the situation".
2) I am going to cut down my Subway consumption by 50-59% and instead I am going to by lunch meat and bread. I actually will never do this. Big shout out to the Subway on 92nd and Greenfield. Even though I never know what the manager is saying to me because he is not from this country I will continue to keep you in business homie.
3) I am going to bust my ass to be on some kind of dance show in the next year. Whether I join the Jabawacheez or grind with Maks on Dancing With the Stars I will make a dance debut. I would even settle for being in a low budget, BET uncut, only seen after 2am video. This video must include some kind of stripper pole, a smoke machine and a girl named "Fo Real".
These are just my first 3 for this week. Stay tuned tomorrow for the next 3.
Hugs and Handpounds,
Czar
Monday, February 7, 2011
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Packers vs. Bears
I will be the first to say it, I dont care if the Packers go to the Superbowl and lose just as long as they beat the Bears this weekend. If you are a true Packers fan this game means more to you than winning the Superbowl against the Patriots more than a decade ago. This is for bragging rights, this is a border war, this will give you Facebook status supremacy. If the Packers win it will shut up Chicago for a year and vice versa. I use to not care about this rivalry and just see it as another football game, but Katie Monhart, Ryan Cigler, Rob Vankammen, Joe Mabry and Jaime Ulbert have made me loathe Bears fans. Luckily I still like all of you, but for this week I think you suck. The Bears beat the Packers in the first game, I will not be the one who says the Packers beat themselves. 18 penalties didnt help, but in that game the Bears were more disciplined than the Packers. In the second game the Packers defense kicked the Bears ass. Then you have dumb ass Bears fans saying "they had nothing to play for". This may be true, but they kept there starters in for the whole game for this very reason. They want nothing to do with the Packers in the playoffs. Guess what......here the Packers fuckin come. Below I will give you reasons why the Packers should beat the Bears on Sunday.
1) Aaron Rodgers is better looking than Jay Cutler. Jay Cutler has the same neck hot dogs as Kimora Simmons and that is gross.
2) That Starks guy might actually be kind of good. So good that I dont even know his first name.
3) While the Bears have better linebackers, that Packers have Clay Matthews. He just needs to get past these next 2 games before he gets busted for steroids. I am all for performance enhancing drugs. If you dont cheat you dont want to win bad enough.
4) Lovie Smith looks like a Jelly Bean.
5) Half the fans in Chicago will have a slab of cheddar on their head. There is nothing more embarressing to me than a cheesehead, but I want to see about 41,000 of those stupid fuckin things at Solider Field.
6) The Packers dont have a retarded song. Our fans just have the stupid chant "Go Pack Go".
7) My last reason is the same as my first reason the Bears have Jay Cutler and the Packers dont.
Good luck to all you dumb ass Bears fans, but do me a favor......whoever loses lets not make excuses. Lets just suck it up and and take the verbal lashing. It must suck to be a Bears fan, having the Packers come to Solider Field for the NFC Championship Game and be home underdogs. HAHAHAHAHA that shit is so funny to me. Oddsmakers dont lie. I hope you all have trouble sleeping at night and just remember you brought this on yourselves.
Chances are you wont be singing your lame song after the Packers win 33-14.
Goodnight now!
Hugs and Handpounds,
Czar
1) Aaron Rodgers is better looking than Jay Cutler. Jay Cutler has the same neck hot dogs as Kimora Simmons and that is gross.
2) That Starks guy might actually be kind of good. So good that I dont even know his first name.
3) While the Bears have better linebackers, that Packers have Clay Matthews. He just needs to get past these next 2 games before he gets busted for steroids. I am all for performance enhancing drugs. If you dont cheat you dont want to win bad enough.
4) Lovie Smith looks like a Jelly Bean.
5) Half the fans in Chicago will have a slab of cheddar on their head. There is nothing more embarressing to me than a cheesehead, but I want to see about 41,000 of those stupid fuckin things at Solider Field.
6) The Packers dont have a retarded song. Our fans just have the stupid chant "Go Pack Go".
7) My last reason is the same as my first reason the Bears have Jay Cutler and the Packers dont.
Good luck to all you dumb ass Bears fans, but do me a favor......whoever loses lets not make excuses. Lets just suck it up and and take the verbal lashing. It must suck to be a Bears fan, having the Packers come to Solider Field for the NFC Championship Game and be home underdogs. HAHAHAHAHA that shit is so funny to me. Oddsmakers dont lie. I hope you all have trouble sleeping at night and just remember you brought this on yourselves.
Chances are you wont be singing your lame song after the Packers win 33-14.
Goodnight now!
Hugs and Handpounds,
Czar
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)