Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Winter Weight....

Another winter has come and gone in Wisconsin and guess what, sure enough, I gained 30 pounds and I am having trouble getting comfortable in my own skin. Nothing better than your belt buckle digging deep into your gut while you sit in you 4 x 4 cubicle at work. The funny thing is when you look in the mirror you dont see it, but your cloths dont lie, when your arm barely makes it through that pink Ralph Lauren polo it might be time to do a few tricep extenstions. I looked at my arms in the mirror this morning and they looked like a #1, supersized value meal from McDs with extra thousand island dressing. My midsection looked like a keg of Icehouse and my legs looked like 2 Oak trees. Maybe wearing comfortable sweatpants and hoodies all winter isnt the right idea. I mean, I love the elastic waist just as much as the next guy, but you never get the feeling that the weight gain has begun and is actually taking off.

The worst day of the year is the day you finally man up and step on the scale for the first time on months. This is also the day you realize things are about to change.

Let me take you step by step through the stepping on the scale process.

1. You look at yourself in the mirror, take a deep breath and get your mind ready for the trauma it is about to encounter.

2. You slowly begin to take articles off clothing off including socks, because you know socks could add an extra pound.

3. You look at yourself in the mirror 1 more time and take a deep breath.

4. You think to yourself, whatever the scale says, I am going to tackle this problem head on.

5. You slowly put one foot on, then the other.

6. You close your eyes and pray it isnt as bad as you think.

7. You begin to open one eye slowly and there it is......30 pounds heavier you are an emotional mess.

8. You dont believe the scale so you try again, this time it actually says .2 heavier and it is a bigger blow to your ego.

9. You then go back to the mirror, take a good look at yourself and begin to tear up.

10. You begin asking yourself questions such as "how did this happen again?"

11. You then begin answering your questions "maybe it was the Toppers sticks at 230am, or the 189 double whoppers, or the ice cream, or the potato chips dipped in ketchup, or the continuous drinking"....then you think to yourself this all makes sense.

Now it is go time, you have your mind right and nothing can take you off track, until someone asks if you want to go drink 2 days later. You just have to say no and work on yourself. I know what this process is like, I do it every year. I have currently lost around 10 lbs and feel a little better. Now everyone who reads this knows I am not going to ever be a skinny guy, but I would like to get some of my swag back for the summer.

The good thing is I have realized the problem and have begun working out the kinks.

The other thing I have realized is through it all I still have amazing hair.

Hugs and Handpounds,
Czar